The biggest idiots of 2007

Yeah, I know, everybody usually comes out with their lists before the year is over. We like to wait until the year is done so we don't miss anything.
Anyway, here's our top five in descending order:

5) The top brass at the San Francisco Zoo:
Whether those three guys provoked that tiger or not, you have some 'splaining to do for the wall that you admitted was too short. Doesn't a zoo patron have the right to think he'll be safe from animals who happen to wander out of their enclosures? Especially from things like tigers?

4. Brittany Spears: If I hear one more radio announcer say, "Oh, oh, wanna hear the latest about Brittany Spears?" No thanks. Her stupidity apparently knows no bounds. And the people around here seem to be enjoying it. After all they're not stopping her. And how come Ryan Seacrest puts up with her? Actually, how come Ryan Seacrest is everywhere? It's bad enough he's on the lame "American Idol". But "Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve," too?

3. Paris Hilton: Notice how Ms. Hilton began doing her part to reform the world after her jail time?
(Long pause.)

2. Bill O'Reilly: Bill-O made the world (unintentionally) funnier though his blustering stupidity. Our favorite was the Stephen Colbert episode. You notice he hasn't appeared on Letterman's show lately? I guess two humiliations were enough.

1. Larry Craig: There's really no other choice. No, he's not gay. No, he didn't do anything in the restroom. Yes, he pled guilty. Yes, he'll resign. No, he won't. Yes, he will. Hey, Larry, be sure and make a big splash at the Republican Convention.

Happy New Year, everyone.

Quotables from "Countdown With Keith Olbermann" Nov. 26-30, 2007

NEW YORK – December 5, 2007 – Following are quotes from "Countdown with Keith Olbermann" for the week of November 26-30. "Countdown With Keith Olbermann." Complete program transcripts are available at www.tv.msnbc.com.


[Referring to the dog that bit a player during the Auburn vs. Alabama football game] Olbermann: "The dog was escorted from the sidelines and caught the first flight to Atlanta for the Michael Vick sentencing."

Olbermann: "The value of celebrity endorsements [in Presidential elections] is in doubt, however, according to a recent Pew Poll that shows newspapers carry more weight than celebrities, that and endorsements from, say, Bill O'Reilly would give the recipient a 10 percent net loss of support."

[Referring to reports that Britney Spears is pregnant]
Joel McHale, E!'s "The Soup": "She [Britney Spears] said her life would be turned around by having a baby. You are right. It would be an entire 360."
Olbermann: "And the skid marks would be seen up and down the boulevard."

Olbermann: "Gail Knight, a 26-year-old student in London, England, seeing a need and coming up with an idea. Just going into service there; if you text the word 'toilet' from your cell phone to SatLab service, it will send you back a text message telling you where the nearest public toilet is. Anybody tell Senator Larry Craig?"

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Conservative talk radio -- dumb and dumber

In the debate over why conservative talk radio outdraws liberal talk radio, I've found the answer and it's incredibly simple.
Conservative talk radio is very simplistic and dumbed down. Dumb and dumber. It's easier to instill fear in your listeners by saying things shouldn't change or they should revert back using old prejudices than to promote intelligent solutions.
They don't call liberals progressives for nothing. Conservatives aren't.
Conservative radio is a mental comfort zone. It's easier for people to lay back and not move forward in their thinking. That, of course, is the weakness of conservatives as a whole.
Look at the debate over immigration and how talk show host have used the logic of prejudice to make their point.
Look at the whole recent "Redacted" controversy manufactured by Bill O'Reilly, who isn't a true conservative talk show host, but more like a sideshow clown. O'Reilly did a cheerleading act to get his audiences to hate "Redacted" before it was released and before even he saw it. Don't bother suggesting your audience judge for themselves. Just tell them it's bad. Easy way out. No work on their part. Dumb and dumber.
Liberal radio, on the other hand, isn't dumbed down. Actually, if there's one thing liberals probably do too much of on the radio is they intellectualize. You don't see a lot of conservative show hosts do that. Their audiences would turn them off in a millisecond.
Conservatives follow the old axiom Keep It Simple, Stupid. Keep 'em entertained. Conservatives wisely keep their ideas in basic terms even a child could understand. Most liberal talk show hosts don't. Conservative ideas generally don't challenge. They rely on existing ideas and prejudices. That's why it's so easy to listen to conservative talk radio. It doesn't take any brainpower.
Most of all, conservatives want to dictate everyone's values. Don't criticize the president. Fund the war and shut up. Marriage is reserved for heterosexuals only. And the most outlandish of all: I got mine, so the hell with everyone else. All too simple answers to complex questions. Conservatives have no compassion, no soul and no values -- unless it benefits them.
Liberals, however, will ultimately triumph in the end. Conservatives may apply the brakes, but liberals supply the propellers. You can't move forward without them.

"Redacted" -- the rhetoric and the reality

Director Brian DePalma got somewhat of an early Christmas present thanks to Bill O'Reilly's venting over DePalma's new film, "Redacted," which O'Reilly criticized without seeing. He said it was unAmerican and would endanger the troops.
Well, we have seen it and O'Reilly, as usual, is wrong.
O'Reilly's overreaction has certainly boosted the visibility of the film. "Redacted" may not do what DePalma hopes -- end the war -- but it delivers a powerful message about the war's effect on its soldiers.
"Redacted" is actually a combination of several stories merged into one film. It's the account of Angel Salazar (played well by Izzy Diaz), who spends a lot of time taking video of his fellow soldiers. Patrick Carroll as Reno Flake and Daniel Stewart Sherman as B.B. Rush also figure heavily into the story and both do a great job.
The big question, though, is is O'Reilly's criticism valid? Does it do an injustice to the troops?
Well, if you are one of those who believes anything that makes the troops look less than perfect is an injustice to them, well, needless to say you won't like it. But despite the less than rosy picture it paints, "Redacted" basically allows that war is hell and soldiers are human, even despite the ugly events depicted in the film.
Do these events and the film itself cast a shadow on the troops? We say no.
We all know war is hell. War movies are hell. "Redacted" isn't the first movie to show the ugly side of war. It won't be the last. It does, however, reveal the injustice of American occupation in a land where we are not always welcome.
But this isn't the fault of the troops, who are there to do a job. It's the fault of our government, who never should have gotten us there in the first place.
"Redacted" is a film that makes a good point, but it certainly isn't enough to make it the be-all, end-all at getting us out of Iraq. That will take the enlightenment of the politicians in Washington, D.C. -- either this administration (unlikely) or the next one.

The "Redacted" official movie site