Paris Hilton seeks advice from a "president"

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Another winner from the guys who brought you the Paris Hilton ad

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Amazon.com Widgets

"I'll see you at the debate, bitches!"

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I can't resist posting this, even though it's probably the most widely seen video of the last few days and will be remembered long after the campaign is over. What's really funny is watching Republicans trying to justify this as a good thing and saying Hilton is adopting McCane's energy policy. Yeah, right. The fact she calls him the oldest man in the world is a really good indication this wasn't meant as a compliment.

The biggest idiots of 2007

Yeah, I know, everybody usually comes out with their lists before the year is over. We like to wait until the year is done so we don't miss anything.
Anyway, here's our top five in descending order:

5) The top brass at the San Francisco Zoo:
Whether those three guys provoked that tiger or not, you have some 'splaining to do for the wall that you admitted was too short. Doesn't a zoo patron have the right to think he'll be safe from animals who happen to wander out of their enclosures? Especially from things like tigers?

4. Brittany Spears: If I hear one more radio announcer say, "Oh, oh, wanna hear the latest about Brittany Spears?" No thanks. Her stupidity apparently knows no bounds. And the people around here seem to be enjoying it. After all they're not stopping her. And how come Ryan Seacrest puts up with her? Actually, how come Ryan Seacrest is everywhere? It's bad enough he's on the lame "American Idol". But "Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve," too?

3. Paris Hilton: Notice how Ms. Hilton began doing her part to reform the world after her jail time?
(Long pause.)

2. Bill O'Reilly: Bill-O made the world (unintentionally) funnier though his blustering stupidity. Our favorite was the Stephen Colbert episode. You notice he hasn't appeared on Letterman's show lately? I guess two humiliations were enough.

1. Larry Craig: There's really no other choice. No, he's not gay. No, he didn't do anything in the restroom. Yes, he pled guilty. Yes, he'll resign. No, he won't. Yes, he will. Hey, Larry, be sure and make a big splash at the Republican Convention.

Happy New Year, everyone.

Paris is free. Can we now get on with life?

Praise the Lord and pass the paparazzi.
Paris Hilton was freed from jail just after midnight last night.
Of course, photographers were falling all over themselves to get a picture of her. As if they don't have enough pictures of her already in every conceivable pose.
Hilton's supposed to be a changed woman. However, did anyone notice how she sauntered down the walk to her SUV like she was working a fashion show? It'll never end, will it?
Now that this silly story is about over -- the Larry King interview tomorrow will end it, hopefully -- let's get to more important stuff -- the latest dirt on Lindsay Lohan.

Is Paris growing up?

It could be some orchestrated publicity event, but on the surface, it appears that Paris Hilton is actually learning from her jail time.

In a statement issued Saturday, she said:

"Today I told my attorneys not to appeal the judge's decision. While I greatly appreciate the Sheriff's concern for my health and welfare, after meeting with doctors I intend to serve my time as ordered by the judge.

This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. During the past several days, I have had a lot of time to reflect and have already learned a bitter, but important lesson from this experience.

As I have said before, I hope others will learn from my mistake. I have also had time to read the mail from my fans. I very much appreciate all of their good wishes and hope they will keep their letters coming.

I must also say that I was shocked to see all of the attention devoted to the amount of time I would spend in jail for what I had done by the media, public and city officials. I would hope going forward that the public and the media will focus on more important things, like the men and women serving our country in Iraq, Afghanistan and other places around the world."

Be with us next time for the next thrilling chapter ...

We'll always have Paris

How many people have laughed over the last year or so at all the Paris Hilton stories? How vapid she is! A rich girl taking advantage of her money and fame!
But how many of those same people were glued to the TV set as the moment-by-moment drama of Paris Hilton going to jail -- again -- was covered like an L.A. police chase?
Sorry, however, if we feel a little sad about this stupidity.
First, there's Sheriff Baca, who seems to be bucking for a job with Hilton Hotels with his bending over backwards to accomodate her. Heck, if he were the judge in this case, he probably would have allowed her to do her court appearance from one of the nightclubs she likes to frequent!
Then, there's the judge. Was his motive in not allowing her to do her time by house arrest a sort of Judge Ito syndrome? Did he crave his 15 minutes of fame?
We're not saying Hilton doesn't deserve what she got. But the way the whole thing went down made it look like if Hilton wasn't such a high-profile personality, she wouldn't be in jail now.
C.W. Nevius of the San Francisco Chronicle summed it up best. Our fascination with this story is about comeuppance.
Nevius wrote:

"We'll forgive a lot in our celebrities, but not arrogance. At this point there's an almost palpable sense that we'd like to see Hilton knocked down a peg.
"What they should have done," says Bob Dorfman, executive creative director at Pickett Advertising, "is put the TV cameras in jail. The ratings would have gone through the roof."
Yep, seeing Paris Hilton actually confront the real world. Everyone would like to watch that.
In fact, everyone is.

They certainly are.